What did I do to her???

I've come to a couple different conclusions: The baby is either a boy or a girl. Now, I know what you're thinking. Where does this insight come from? Or perhaps you're thinking that I must believe myself to be some sort of psychic to make such a prediction. Or maybe you're thinking I'm a fool.

Nonetheless, I maintain that this child could either be a boy or a girl. Here is why. I've not been writing in this blog for very long now [read: a couple days], but I made no secret of the fact--in my first and only post--that I'm afraid of having difficult reconciling the fact that the child growing inside my wife is a girl. That's because both girls in my house growing up, sans my mother (but it's been a long time since she was a girl) were royal pains in the backside. It's a wonder why my father is not bald. That said, he does have a lot of gray hair for his age though, but I digress.

Lately my wife complains that she is, constantly, ill. Yesterday, I had the misfortune of being in the bathroom while she was in the act of being ill. It was, strangely, fascinating. It's been a long time since I've thrown up. The very thought of it makes me sick. In fact, whenever I think I could be sick, I sit down and focus on not going through the act. Regardless, my wife claims that she is always sick, and lately feels like she always needs to throw up, but can't. For this reason, I think it may be a girl. Hear me out, now. If, in my, admittedly, limited experience, girls cause lots of trouble after they're born, doesn't it stand to reason that they cause just as much trouble before they come out?

But as I thought about it, I remembered something my wife once told me. For background, she works with elementary kids in school. And, she said that boys are terrors before they're teenagers; girls become terrors after they're teenagers. That made sense, as I'm pretty sure I was a huge pain before I matured. By the way, being mature does not mean one is taller, just FYI. So, I decided this child is a boy.

So, using the same logic that Vizzini used in The Princess Bride, I can clearly conclude that this child is either a boy or a girl.